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Hard time finding the "right" Mistress

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Last edited on 13 April 2006 03:41 AM by gpsdude

Posted: 13 April 2006 03:40 AM

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gpsdude
Member

Joined:	12 April 2006
Location:
Posts:	1

Hello, and thanks for inviting me to the forum (whoever did).

I have been kind of stuck finding the right Mistress to give my money to. My only real requirement is that she be local to me, within an hours drive. I have tried some long distance Mistresses, and it's not my thing.

Getting an email or a phone call from someone far away and asking for money just does not compel me to give in. However, if a strange girl approached me in person and asked for money for no good reason, I would not be able to reach for my ATM card fast enough.

I had a local Mistress last summer for a few months, and I was quite happy with her, but she basically moved out of state and became too busy for me. My willingness dropped, and she even understood and "released" me for a hefty tribute.

The closest thing I have right now which "might" count as a financial Mistress is a stripper I am quite fond of in a nearby strip club. Whenever I have money, I go and see her exclusively. She knows she can easily get $300 to $500 a night from me in lap dances. A few times she has exceeded my available ATM limit, I had to beg for $3 to get my car from the valet upon leaving.

I have told her a many times I would easily give it to her "outside" of the club no strings attached if she would just call me, or even hold onto my credit card and use it as she sees fit. I often offer to take her shopping on my tab if she would meet me at a mall. All this makes her uncomfotable. She has my number but has never called me. I even went 1 month without going there to see if she will call, but no.

So maybe she is my Mistress in the sense that I am dedicated to spending all my money on her, but it's not in the traditonal sense of letting her bleed me dry or being controlled by her. This is what I miss most.

I just can't bring myself to tribute a non-local Mistress so I am stuck with her for now. Thanks for letting me vent.

gpsdude

Last edited on 13 April 2006 03:41 AM by gpsdude

Posted: 13 April 2006 08:44 PM

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InsolentBastard
Administrator

Joined:	6 March 2006
Location:	Columbus, Ohio USA
Posts:	26

Dancers are notorious for knowing how to separate a man from his money in a fairly quick time frame, and strippers were probably the first financial mistresses of modern times. Your stripper is probably nervous of (1) losing her job at the club if she gets caught taking money from a customer outside of the club, and (2) she is nervous of meeting you personally outside of the club. I would continue to be polite to her at the club. I wouldn't mention the fantasy to her for awhile. In the meantime, you could have something sent to the club for her on a night when you know she is working and see how she reacts to it. It may help her see that you're non-threatening and not some freak who is looking for a sexual relationship outside of the club. Also, she is no doubt talking about you with other dancers at the club, so even if this dancer doesn't end up fulfilling your money slave fanatsy outside of the club, another dancer might step up for you. Good luck finding someone local to you.

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Posted: 5 May 2006 03:40 AM

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bleddry
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Joined:	4 May 2006
Location:
Posts:	2

I too have a few strippers who are basically my money dommes, they just don't know it, or perhaps more accurately, we just don't talk about it. I have spent $1,000's on them, I have their cell numbers, they have mine, and some of them call me fairly regularly in an effort to drag me into the clubs so they can take my money. They just don't say it that way.

I would suggest you not offer to meet them outside of the club. That has to be their idea. There are some dangerous people out there and they need to be careful. This should make them uncomfortable. Instead, I have bought strippers outfits and spiked heels, etc., on line. Find out if they shop online, what sites they like, and then offer to buy something for them. It is a humiliating rush to show up with gifts for your stripper, have her take them from you, and then she takes you in the back and screws you out of hundreds more!

The only draw back is, at least so far, the dominant/submissive aspect of the relationship remains unspoken. I worry that for some of these girls it would just seem too weird, it would freak them out and it would negatively effect the relationship. I don't want to lose the sexual dominance they exercise over me, whether they realize they are doing it or not.

I am very interested to hear any and all other opinions and experiences with strippers! They represent an awesomw (and very expensive!) fetish!

Last edited on 7 May 2006 04:29 PM by gemma_d

Posted: 7 May 2006 02:52 PM

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gemma_d
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Joined:	23 March 2006
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Posts:	22

Funnily enough I take the exact opposite view, which may be a function of the difference between men and women, but it is also indicative of why it's important not to generalise. As an aside, one of the good things about this message board is that it is home to intelligent people, who seem to appreciate that generalisations are neither helpful nor appropriate.

For me there is an intensity to an online relationship that far exceeds anything that can be achieved in "real life". I think this is partly due to the fact that the relationship is grounded in imagination and not physicality (though I appreciate that the latter though tends to be more important to guys!). The psychology of this acts as a lens through which emotions can be magnified to quite an extraordinary degree. Certainly my relationship with Goddess Karen has produced an intensity of feeling that I would not have believed possible. I know I can speak for both us when I say that the implications of this is something we are only just starting to explore.

The other element of an online relationship is that it allows the submissive to create a living mythology of their object of worship. Within the topography of this relationship the scope for genuine deification is unlimited, and again the implications of this for both the Domme and the submissive are enormous. I doubt this could happen in a "real life" relationship where natural human foibles will inevitable intrude to some degree.

As I said, I really do appreciate that that we are all looking for different things from these relationships, and I wish you well with your search. However, you may find that a purely online relationship offers a different kind of experience that might be just as rewarding for you.

Last edited on 7 May 2006 04:29 PM by gemma_d

Posted: 7 May 2006 11:18 PM

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obsessivesub
Member

Joined:	4 April 2006
Location:
Posts:	35

If the stripper has any experience, she's probably had customers who want to be dominated. She's probably knowledgeable about male fetishes -- after all, she uses her body in response to male fetishes. Why not try the direct approach of telling her that you like to be dominated and humiliated and that being made to give her gifts, shop for her, and give up financial control to her is your fetish? Just telling her this will be quite a turn-on for you, and if you accompany it with some gifts it'll show her that you're serious.

my only experience with a stripper occurred years ago when my then male master took me to a strip club and arranged for me to get a lap dance. He told the girl that i was his slave and it didn't faze her at all. She could tell i was very submissive and she thought it was sweet.

i agree with gemma that online submission is a great alternative especially if you're into the psychological aspects.

AG's little eddie

Posted: 8 May 2006 09:07 PM

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LadyEvilOK
Financial Mistress

Joined:	27 March 2006
Location:
Posts:	1

I can relate to the difficulty in finding someone local. For the Domme it is sometimes just as difficult to find someone local. Seems all I find or who find me are strictly online as well. Oh well...still hoping

Lady R

Posted: 10 May 2006 08:47 PM

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TheAsianGoddess
Financial Mistress & Moderator

Joined:	14 March 2006
Location:	Saint Louis, Missouri USA
Posts:	47

obsessivesub wrote: If the stripper has any experience, she's probably had customers who want to be dominated. She's probably knowledgeable about male fetishes -- after all, she uses her body in response to male fetishes. Why not try the direct approach of telling her that you like to be dominated and humiliated and that being made to give her gifts, shop for her, and give up financial control to her is your fetish? Just telling her this will be quite a turn-on for you, and if you accompany it with some gifts it'll show her that you're serious.

I agree. those girls are JUST as greedy - and if you let them know your weakness' they will use them for their own gain !!!! of course, they may just not care !!! I have had many male friends over the years that are addicted to the strip clubs for thier own reasons. Ive also had stripper friends who are very good at what they do, and a long time ago I would be stunned at all the LOOT and pressies they would get - it just wasnt MY cup of tea. Im not gonna rub MY body over some weird stranger ! having said that - if you tell her - she will cum ! hahhaha

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Posted: 11 May 2006 11:16 PM

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bleddry
Member

Joined:	4 May 2006
Location:
Posts:	2

There are many interesting posts here! First let me say that I believe I am slowly coming around to gemma's conclusion that there are many, many advantages to an online relationship as opposed to a "real world" one. For one small example, it is incredibly frustrating to drive 45 minutes to the strip club just to find that my favorite girl isn't there, after all. It is extremely time consuming and happens all the time!

As for obsessive sub's and Goddess Karen's comments, perhaps it is merely my own natural shyness that prevents me from telling a dancer face to face what my fetish is, whereas I have done it online fairly easily? Maybe my concern about a girl getting "weirded out" is just a lame excuse for not "outting" myself in real life? I have certainly experienced the sting of their greed before, so perhaps they would be thrilled to know for ceratin that they could financially abuse me to an even greater degree!

Food for thought - thank you all! (And thanks for letting me vent!)

Posted: 11 May 2006 11:49 PM

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TheAsianGoddess
Financial Mistress & Moderator

Joined:	14 March 2006
Location:	Saint Louis, Missouri USA
Posts:	47

bleddry wrote: As for obsessive sub's and Goddess Karen's comments, perhaps it is merely my own natural shyness that prevents me from telling a dancer face to face what my fetish is, whereas I have done it online fairly easily?
bleddry - try and think of being shy- as a choice. you have a choice to be shy or not, and yes, Im sure being "outted" in real life is a brave thing to do, because once you do that - you may feel like its now fully true - you have a fetish - but dont be embarrassed by it - EMBRACE IT !

____________________
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Posted: 10 June 2006 03:01 AM

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MistressJane
Financial Mistress

Joined:	9 June 2006
Location:	British Columbia Canada
Posts:	3

I'd LOVE to have a local slave to take me shopping and catering to ME.

One of my fantasies is to have a slave hire a limo for me and my girlfriends, taking us on a shopping spree, carrying everything and of course paying for it

Anyone live in Western Canada?

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Posted: 16 June 2006 02:10 PM

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MsAlliesslave
Member

Joined:	16 June 2006
Location:	USA
Posts:	8

gpsdude wrote: Hello, and thanks for inviting me to the forum (whoever did).

I have been kind of stuck finding the right Mistress to give my money to. My only real requirement is that she be local to me, within an hours drive. I have tried some long distance Mistresses, and it's not my thing.

IF you don't post where you are none of the Women here can help you.

Posted: 20 June 2006 03:17 PM

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Mistress Katrina
Financial Mistress

Joined:	19 June 2006
Location:	United Kingdom
Posts:	4

HI I think Gemma is right.

An on line mistress can control you just the same or probably more on line than in real life, if you have an active imagination and want to explore deeper on line. It is safer aswell as noone knows who you are, and till you build up a trust with your mistress/goddess then you are safe, it is only when the mistress draws you in you are in trouble.

I have one slave who has been serving me for a few weeks now, and he is already showing signs of weakness, I now know what to do to strip him of the rest. He is a real life slave met off a internet site and he said it is weakness for me that pushed him over the edge. He had tried for years to find someone then I came along, now he is lost in my world.

____________________
LOSE EVERYTHING TO ME

Posted: 23 July 2006 04:53 AM

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PaigeDWinter
Financial Mistress

Joined:	11 July 2006
Location:	Cocoa Beach, Florida USA
Posts:	16

There are pros and cons to both sides of this coin. I like having slaves nearby, so I can have them buy Me things right then and there... things I can try on, see in person before I choose to get it... There is less waiting time for tributes... But there are more online slaves that I can meet and gain..... The internet is especially helpful if you live in an area with a small fetish scene and minimal/no fetish advertising...

As for strippers... Heh. I am able to use My experience as a spoiled woman, My experience as a Domina, and My experience as a dancer to up My game. The combination just cant be beat IMHO....

Paige D'Winter

Central Florida's Finest in Foot & Leg worship and Financial Domination. The Goddess Has Arrived!

http://www.paigedwinter.com
http://www.livejournal.com/users/paigedwinter
http://community.livejournal.com/paigewants/
http://www.myspace.com/paigedwinter
http://www.niteflirt.com/PaigeDWinter
http://www.paigedwinter.com/temple.html
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/TempleOfGoddessPaige
http://www.livejournal.com/community/flfootfetish/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FloridaFootAndHeelsFetish/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/FloridaFootAndHeelsFetish/

Posted: 19 March 2008 12:24 AM

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PrincessCaramelCandi
Member

Joined:	18 December 2007
Location:	Southwest, Ohio USA
Posts:	4

First of all I know this is an old thread. I just wanted to chime in with PaigeDWinter. I danced for 13 yrs and I can attest that my experiences there help with my r/t sessions a great deal.

Some of the women in these strip clubs have what is called "the gift of gab". They can talk a wallet out of a man's pocket without a lap dance or anything else. They are very good at what they do. **By the way physical contact between dancer and patron are illegal in bars where I live**.

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Caramel Ebony Fetish Princess Financial Domination Worldwide

Posted: 19 March 2008 09:29 AM

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goddessvaruna
Member

Joined:	16 January 2008
Location:	USA
Posts:	5

GPSDude... where the hell are you from? It is going to be hard for you to find someone in your area if you don't even list what state you are in OR how to contact you.

I personally think that, despite having not had experience as a dancer, there are definitely a lot of aspects of My life that have given me certain qualities that allow Myself to easily extract what I want from people, although specifically men.
If you've ever worked a really competitive sales job, where you must talk and charm the crap out of people, thats one, although the aspect of flirtation is sort of taken out of the picture. It takes very little effort for men to submit to My fatal charm

I really wouldn't be surprised if this entire fetish was something entirely discovered in the beginning by dancers though.

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Posted: 2 August 2008 03:06 AM

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Mistress Eve Vermilion
Member

Joined:	31 July 2008
Location:	USA
Posts:	3

if you were My slave I would give you instructions on exactly what I want you to say to those strippers. then for every 100 bucks you give them, you would tribute ME double. you'd be on shopping sprees that most subs can only dream about.

____________________
Mistress Eve Vermilion

Posted: 14 August 2008 03:44 PM

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GoddessAmber
Member

Joined:	13 August 2008
Location:
Posts:	6

I would love to find a slave near by me. To take me on a shopping spree in Chicago, with my girlfriends. Limo and all. I know we could tab up a great big bill. lol Then laugh at our slave the whole time on how pathetic he is.

As for a stripper..they might be afraid of losing their job, if they meet outside of the club. They could have a boyfriend at home who wouldn't approve.

Good luck!

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